From bad to worse: Addiction Alcohol

I was never an alcoholic so I can't say this is a personal addiction but I lived with one. Moving from North Carolina back to Oklahoma was not exactly what I wanted to do again. Not that I don't like Oklahoma, just when you have 2 kids, animals,  2 vehicles,  and all your crap, that 18hr trip is too much. I was beyond sick of my ex changing companies every year or two then towards the end, every few months. He was a money chasers, but worse than that, he could never pass a drug test to keep a job. As I was younger I never realized how important having health insurance was. We didn't have it often because of his constantly changing jobs. But moving to Stillwater OK was nothing short of the most miserable time of my 9 year relationship with him. On the day we moved in (in several feet of snow) he and a friend snuck off and came back an hour later with nothing more than the infamous baggie of white powder. I was very upset. I thought that part of life was over. But the drugs were never a consistent thing. The alcohol on the other hand was a necessity in my house. Every single day I would watch him drink himself til he passed out. I didn't Dar wake him and when I did I would get called fat, ugly, stupid, bitch, whore... just to name the least. If we were low on a bottle of liquor or beer I would get yelled at. It wasnt until memorial day of 2011 I finally put my foot down once and for all. We were planning to go to Tulsa with the kids for a nice evening out in the city. While I was getting dolled up, he was getting hammered. I did not know. I come out ready to go to find him half passed out on the couch. I was boiling mad and I started yelling at him. Then the name calling started from him but worse than usual. It was brutal and it still hurts me to talk about this night. He was so mad he forced me amd the kids into the truck and he jumped in the drivers seat full blown drunk. He drove at speeds well over 100mph swerving all over the place, running off the road, he nearly killed two kids on a motorcycle. They were very lucky. He came inches from creaming them going about 70mph in a 30mph zone. We got to the next town and he pulled into a parking lot and threw me out of the truck and drove away with the kids. I started walking to a store for help and he came back and pulled me into the truck again. We made it to Tulsa somehow in one piece where he once again threw me out and drove away. I called the police but I had no idea where I was. He once again found me. I was so freaked out I hit him in the face and he hit me in the face twice then screamed at me to take him to a friends house, this friend was a drug dealer. I refused and after about an hour of threats on my life I decided to trick him. I guided him on the back roads back home. It wasn't but about 40 miles out, in the middle of nowhere at midnight,  my trucks engine gave out from the extreme workout it had received over those last 5 hours. He abandoned us..in the middle middle middle where.. no words..just drunk, he left myself and two kids in a dead truck at midnight on the side of the road. He was arrested that night. Had his license taken away, was slapped with multiple fines, had to take classes for alcoholics.. if it wasnt for a good friend coming to my rescue,  I dont know how long I would have been stranded there. My cell phone was dead. Two traumatized kids, and it was hot outside. He promised to stop drinking. . Promised to get help..Promised to go to classes.. June, he did not drink..but no other promises..July, no promises and drinking again. I met my husband Aron in August. To me, he was everything I could want in a man. My ex husband was nothing I wanted. I left him in October.
An alcoholic will only quit if HE OR SHE wants to quit. It was obvious my ex didn't want to amd he still drinks. He lost a wife of 9 years, lost multiple jobs, lost his freedom to drive, lost the respect of friends and family, lost a lot of money to the state.. Alcohol bruised my self esteem,  Alcohol turned me into an angry person fpr a long time, alcohol scars memories, even if you aren't the alcoholic,  if you deal with those who are, you will be damaged by it.